The Blog and Pony Show

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Candy Store Rock

I feel very unusually hip to things today. I Googled, Wikepedia'd, even Urban Dictionaried the phrase "Photo Whoring" but did not find any actual definitions or commentaries regarding this phenonmenon, in spite of the fact that there are plenty of kids out there who list this as one of their hobbies.

Ladies and gents, I shall now present to you, for the first time anywhere, my own attempt at defining the term "photo whoring":

photo whoring: Sometimes called "picture whoring". v. The act of bombarding a website or board, yours or otherwise, with many photos of oneself, or one's favorite subject that show one or that subject in the most favorable possible way; usually to elicit a favorable response from others on the site or board. Often, these photos will be touched up and cropped to highlight the subject's most desirable features while drawing attention away from any defects. Example: "If it wasn't for my avid photo whoring, no one on the internet would have noticed that I dyed my hair pink, or believed that it looked good for ten minutes last wednesday night."


This is one of those "internet phenomenon" that I just can't wait for the right journalist to get a hold of. They'll do some piece about the depravity of vanity that the internet has inspired in our ten-second, tell-me-I'm-cute, soul-imporverished youth. Time Magazine will do an obligatory cover story, with an accompanying side piece on the irony of how the internet was supposed to make us all anonymous, and that we would no longer be judged by our appearance, age, etc. Time would also remind its readers, of course, that Oprah will air a program on the subject next Tuesday at 4pm. And who will be on the panel? Some concerned parent's group advocate, a bunch of insolent teens, one snazzy adolescent who has found a way to save starving babies in Iraq through photo whoring and yours truly for breaking this new and disturbing trend in youth culture and submitting it's definition to Wikepedia (that's MY entry. Remember to give Gretchen at Blog and Pony show my due props!).

See you next Tuesday at 4pm...